Female domination is the fantasy that a woman uses her sexual power over a man to torture and humiliate him sexually. This is done for the sexual pleasure of both the woman and the man…at least that’s the fantasy. In reality, no woman enjoys sexually dominating a man, which is why men have to pay a dominatrix. Women want to be with a man they respect, it gives them sexual pleasure to feel like their man is confident and powerful.
This means if a man convinces a woman to sexually dominate him, she is doing him a favor. She is being asked to do something contrary to her natural sexual desires. And because it is contrary to her nature, she is turned off by sexually dominating a man.
Asking a woman to dominate you can ruin your relationship with her. Particularly if you have elevated female domination to the status of a religion, if you take the act so seriously that is has the power of religious experience in your mind. This kind of fervor is sometimes referred to as being a “lifestyle slave.” In such cases, the man wants the woman to dominate him 24/7, he wants being a dominatrix to become her identity. Ironically, female domination is all about what the male slave wants. This is not what people obsessed with the fantasy want to hear, but it is the truth.
So why do men fantasize about female domination? The turn on is the hyper-sexualizing of the woman. The man knows he is driven wild by his woman’s beauty and femininity, and he wants to give himself over fully to his desires. He wants to live only for the sexual pleasure his woman gives him. This is done by two means. First, he exalts the woman. He makes her will irresistible to himself by virtue of her internal and external sexual attractiveness. Second, he humiliates himself. He suppresses his will, making himself lower than the woman. This creates a greater sense of contrast between the woman and the man. And since the reason for this contrast is the woman’s femininity and beauty, her sexuality is highlighted. It is because of her female mind, her curves, her breasts, etc. that he is her slave, and he has made this known to her. Now every act of domination is a use of the woman’s femininity and beauty to interact with him. In other words, their every interaction is about her sexual attractiveness.
Such men would do well to recognize that sexual attractiveness plays a huge role in a regular relationship as well; it’s just not the only component, and it is appreciated rather than worshipped. The fantasies about female domination will continue, and though I’m repentant, I’ll continue to have them myself. This is because they work. Female domination is a turn on in the mind, (where you’re not totally disappointing a real woman). Making everything all about a woman’s sexual attractiveness is normal in a sexual fantasy, but such an attitude will not survive in a relationship with a real woman.
Female domination is a kind of theatre, where the woman performs for the sexual pleasure of the man. She plays the role of an always angry, or at least deliberately cruel, person whose joy comes from making the man suffer sexually. It turns women off, so men will have to continue paying for it. Or at least pressure the women in their life into playing a game contrary to their nature.
Lastly, from a Christian perspective we can ask, is female domination a sin? Indeed it is, because it insults the image of God in humanity. It insults image of God in the woman, by causing here to assume an attitude towards the man which is unkind. And it insults the image of God in the man, by causing him to degrade himself in relation to the woman. The fact that this is done willfully does not change the fact that it insults the image of God placed in humanity.